Epiphany

This epiphany has hit me;
somehow everything has changed.
Six months ago I woke up
ev'ry morn feeling afraid -
Afraid that you would leave me,
that you had no love to give -
Afraid of some dishonesty,
some lie to trap me in.
Somewhere along the line it seems
these fears, with time, dissolved.
Your presence now feels safe to me;
all my worries are assuaged.
Your arms bring me security;
they calm my roughest waves.
Your words bring me much comfort,
which softly shakes me from my daze.
Where once wounds, deep, had gouged me,
now only linger soft, white scars.
And though I'd locked my heart away,
you've crashed right through those bars.
So at once I'll say: I'm sorry,
for keeping up my guard.
But I'll also smile and thank you,
for softening up my heart.
Your patience has been crucial
in unlocking all my gates,
and at the top of these broad turrets,
my nest, you rest, and keep me safe.

sensuality

it reaches out and grabs me:
your sensuality -
then wraps me up in comfort;
a familiar, welcome dream.
blue eyes, so deep, invite me
to take shelter in your storm,
the center of which moves me,
giving motion to my form.
your tenderness is wholesome
as it wraps me in its arms.
tightly I'm entwined within
this nest which I adore.
each time I return home there,
I feel safe, soft, at ease -
I'm surrounded by your loving;
my harbinger of peace.

lingerer

I hate you 'cause I love you
and I know you love me, too.
I love the way your eyes shine
that deep, inviting blue.
It pulls me in, so haunting -
grasping, pawing at my soul,
daring me to chase you,
to leap through a solid wall.
The bricks are daunting to me,
keeping me held back.
There's something in your manner
suggesting you'd feel trapped.
No matter what my heart says,
I'm scared to show my hand.
My instinct says you're flawless -
my head knows you are fanged.
There's danger in your waters;
the faintest ripple of a shark.
It's keeping me from trying
to see what's within your heart.
Some day, I hope, I'll find you,
a beacon blaring bright.
But if I don't, I'm sure that
you'll still linger in my mind.

meteor storms

When I look down at your face I
get this sense of loneliness
eyes are closed, breathing paced
right beside me with such distance, you
lay beside me, touch me, warm
but I can't feel your energy
and in my eyes there is a storm
held back only with a bravery, which
threatens to erase, incinerate
anything that dares come near
this tempest comes and goes in waves
bursting, thirsting, full of fear, but
as I look on through the gale
a trailing glimmer lights the sky
the squall is now so strongly paled
by memories of hearts on high, and
though a scar has been undug
I know your hands, their healing touch;
tenderly the ache is calmed
as I remember: we are us, who
couldn't help but fall in love
when climbing, conquering our mountains
we have touched the stars above
as they connected Earth to Heaven.

my nest

my nest, it keeps me safe and warm
and even in the worst of storms
inside it's walls I feel at ease
hurricanes become soft breeze
I know for sure it's safe to say
that come rainy or sunny days
I'll always have a place to go
to rest and heal my weary soul
so I can stretch my wings again
feel them push against the wind
and though I love to see the sky
back to my nest I'll always fly.

something profound

SOMETHING causes me to feel this way:
I think you've got strong things to say.
Why don't those words just leave your lips?
Please spit it out, I'll man my ship.
There must be something on your mind.
Why is it that I feel so blind?
Blind to your thoughts, your feels, your wants...
Just say something, I need response!
Maybe out of fear I look too deep -
I try too hard to find something.
Something that will make me sting,
will make me want to break my stuff,
make me feel I am enough,
enough for you to stick around,
for you to want to make a sound.
I cannot be the only one,
to step up, openly confront,
the feelings that I have toward this,
this never-ending deep abyss.
A rock must in time stop it's fall.
At this thought, I feel appalled.
Can I accept good energy?
Why can't I realize my old dreams?
Something inside holds me back.
It wraps me tight, keeps me entrapped.
Why must "trap" even be a part,
Of anything inside my heart?
It cannot, should not, will not be!
I must let this go with certainty,
Or capture it and break it down,
Rip it up and stomp around.
Pull it open, dig it out,
distill it down to end this drought,
before I ruin what's been found;
lose something I hold profound.

Old Strings

I feel it fluttering deep inside -
Whatever it is just seems to hide.
There is no glimmer in your eyes;
I wonder if they'd even cry.

I cannot read you, cannot see,
Inside your deep, dark mystery.
I feel a move could make you flee!
Why risk the possibility?

Why is it that you drown in fear,
Of keeping any person near?
Have you even leaked a tear,
To mourn the one you've missed for years?

There's nothing I can do for you.
You must be the one to seek the truth,
To find old strings you must set loose,
And then forward, you can move.

Enigmatic

You are somewhat enigmatic,
And I'm curious to know:
What is there inside of you?
Why do you hide your glow?

I think I'd like to find out,
Who you really are.
There's wonder hidden underneath -
I sense it from your heart.

And if I meet something too real,
Will I feel exposed?
What will I do if I find hell,
Behind the doors now closed?

If I reach out and take your hand,
And all it brings is pain,
Will I survive that wrath again?
You see why I'm afraid?

Despite all of my worries,
There's a part of me that stirs.
I dare to say it's worth the risk,
In quest for some thing more.

I don't want to fear for feel of love,
So try I will to seek the flame.
To reach through someone else's soul,
Is an act that holds no shame.

Something Beautiful

Something beautiful
My way did walk.
A figure so graceful,
My heart beat did stop.

Warm summer sunshine
Danced in the air -
A shimmer, a glimmer,
Of something so rare.

A hand that stretched out
For eternity,
Trying to reach;
To set the soul free.

Something beautiful,
It shivers, it sparks,
It glistens, it trembles,
It instigates art.

The glow of the stars
Will pale when compared
To anything given;
A happiness shared.

Do The Time

I hope one day to more than glimpse,

A moment of tingling fingertips.

A heart that beats in rhyme with mine,

A drum that shifts the sands of time.

Some chord with perfect melody,

A spirit to run free with me,

To grasp the tendrils of my flame,

To make me feel almost insane.

A force to defy common sense,

To break down any stupid fence.

That makes me want to shout with awe,

And leaves me feeling more than raw.

I want someone to do the time,

Resulting from our perfect crime.

Smoke

Smoke, it curls around her lips -
Vapor dances across her fingertips.
Wispy trails caress her form,
As she begs smoke: please stay strong.
Mist curls and twists against the breeze,
Disappearing now into the trees.
And just like that, the trail is gone.
When she looks, smoke can't be found.
Soot's heat is now mere memory,
Something that cannot be seen.
Her eyes grow full with fear of loss;
Smoke is gone like a cunning fox.
She'll reach and grasp so desperately,
Praying for a glimpse of smoke on breeze.

Edge of a Cliff

I'm on the edge of a cliff waiting for you,
To make up your mind - please tell me the truth.
Either let me fall or pull me in.
One way or another, I will begin.
With or without you, I will move on.
I want to do it together and make us strong.
If I must fall to the bottom and pick myself up,
I'm sure I can do it - my heart is tough.
I know it takes time to fall back in love,
And move past all of this horrible stuff.
But I'm fighting for balance while I wait to see,
If under the pain your heart still loves me.
Please push me off, man, or pull me back in,
So my heart can start moving forward again.

Intention

Love is a human need and a heart's desire.
Hey, don't you know you stoke my fire?
I want to give you all that I have,
So we can stray from pain in the past.

All I want is for you to see -
Do you remember what you thought of me?
Way back when we fell in love...
I knew you were the hand that fit my glove.

I do not want all we have to be lost,
So let's build a bridge - we can make it across.
My hands are stretched out in your direction,
Take them or don't; show me your intention.

Scar Tissue

I am so scared of the distance between us,
I have lost so much of you already.
I'm trying so hard to show you my patience,
I know you can't love til your heart is steady.

All the damage I've done is stuck in my brain,
So many regrets for things done and said.
I want so badly to move past this pain,
But I feel like we're stuck in limbo instead.

I know we can heal this together - I'm sure!
Scar tissue is thicker and tougher than skin.
Please, sir, there's so much I want to explore.
Our hearts can start beating together again.

The Silence of Us

I was inspired by the silence of us.
The simplicity - so little can hold so much.
That moment you held me in your arms,
I was bullet proof - the world could do no harm.
In that quiet I released so much tension.
It had all built up through repression.
We never confronted, together, all of our fears.
They separated us like a line of spears.
Let's pull these spears out of the ground,
Open our eyes and look around.
What can we do to escape this desert?
Save our love - the ultimate treasure.

What is Love?

Isn't it amazing,
How fucked society can be?
I'd rather run up to the mountains,
And hide inside a tree.
I think that we've forgotten,
What true love really is.
It's not some hot commodity,
It's so much more than hips.
Love isn't about virtue,
Or what you can provide.
It's not some magic story,
You can't get it with a bribe.
It takes time and understanding,
And a bit of chemistry.
And if you don't know compromise,
Then love isn't your scene.
Love is the whisper of a breeze,
Through trees on rainy days.
It's that spark that starts a fire,
In your lover's gaze.
It's the strength of caring arms,
When life becomes a fight.
It takes the weight off of your back,
When you've forgotten how to shine.
Love sees what is within you,
When you can't see yourself.
It's the force that pulls you up again,
When you've fallen off your shelf.
It gives you balance when you're lost,
And keeps life fresh and new.
Dive right in at any cost,
All is best when love-imbued.

To Feel

"What is it like to feel the rain?"
She asked him, deep in thought.
"Sometimes I think I forgot my name,
And I don't know where I stop.
Am I a part of this lovely world,
Or is it a part of me?
Is it my mind that created gold,
In my heart, is there too much greed?
Is any of this even real,
Or have I manufactured it all?
Please tell me, are you made of steel,
Or intangible as the things I draw?"
And as she lay there next to him,
He reached out, grabbed her hand.
The sky opened up and touched her skin,
Reminded her she could feel again.
Her heart broke open, open wide,
As he whispered in her ear:
"Just remember who you are inside,
I love you for that, my dear."

Without You

I'm sitting on this porch
     Without you.
I'm watching the orange
     Take over the blue.
Before long it will be too late
     No escape.
There's no surrender now
     Forget it.
Then it was now or never
     Gone like a feather.
I've tasted the freedom now
     Can't you see?
The only thing I need
     Is me.
I've got my own back
     Without you.
I'm letting the happy
     Take over the blue.

Presence

It's that feeling when you say you miss me so much
It's that deep down, heart wrenching throb in my gut.
In your arms is where I'd rather be
Than halfway across this huge country.
Without you, I'm sure that I can get by
But Mister, that's one thing I'm loathe to try.
I'd love to wake up with you by my side
The palm of your hand against my thigh.
I love the way you touch my hair
The feel of your skin against mine; bare.
I can't wait until I can see you again
Sweet nothings in text will suit me til then.
Words from you in the morning make my day
Without them I fear I'd get lost in the fray.
No matter how close or far you are
The strength of your presence warms my heart.

The Way I Am

I wish I didn't have to explain

Why I am the way I am.

Isn't it enough to say:

It's natural, it cannot change.

I love who I love

If their hand fits my glove.

I refuse to please society

And its fucked up views on monogamy.

The American Dream is a trap -

It will eventually lead to a collapse.

Devoting your life to just one soul

Takes away chances for personal growth.

The last thing I want is to be stuck in one place,

Unable to move, and unable to chase

The dreams that run throughout my head

Which lead me to have an open bed.

My arms are open, open wide

If I accept your heart, please come inside.

All I want is to share my life

With those who don't see me as a prize.

The last thing I am is a trophy.

If all you see is my beauty,

Please move on, I need much more

Than someone who wants me to stand by the door

And show off the home with a white picket fence -

That life would only make me depressed.

I want to explore the wide open world

I am so much more than a little girl!

I have goals and dreams and so much hope.

The last thing I need is to be held down by rope.

I want to run and be wild - no holding back

By the things society seems to lack.

I'm forgetting all the lies that I have been told

The last thing I have to do is fit a mold.

I'll shout in the face of those who disagree!

I won't give up my chance to be free.

The last thing I want to do is conform

To the bullshit that's called "Societal Norms."

I'll fly way up into the sky,

Let my wings take me high, high, high.

Looking down I'll see the crowds,

Of those who are trapped beneath the clouds.

I'll shout to them to break out of the box.

Come join me where there are no locks

To hold you back and beat you down,

Above the clouds, you cannot drown.

Be who you are and you will see

How wrong society can be.